middling around.

so as it turns out it was the dude from Voxtrot who played between sets at the Land of Talk show, which k & i realized when we went to CelebrateBrooklyn! (love the exclamation point, guys) for the aforementioned TV on the Radio, where V.Trot opened for them. thanks to this total coincidence we got a double-take of a couple songs, one night perf'd by just the frontman (Ramesh, thatd be him in the photo, from brooklyn vegan), the next by the full band.

(god damn does my head hurt. also, im wondering why the hudson only got two sets of fireworks, and the east river three. although last year i guess they were all on the east, so maybe i shouldnt wonder, but threes are really satisfying.)

one of which was raised by wolves (right-click-save-target, goes a little nutty if you dont, too lazy to fix so im typing all this out instead). this is the V.Trot version, but it was really way better done by ramesh when he was just rockin out, less smooth-poppy & more as if it (rah!) had meaning ; it was a little dave-matthews-y at the bandshell (venue-appropriate, arguably), very like "go ahead! love me! sure ill never love like you do, who the fuck cares, i love great! i LOVE my love!" (uh, you need to listen to the song for that to make sense) whereas when he went it alone it was pretty clear where the song came from, and why. which of course isnt always easy to convey! --but that was the glory of the first rendition, and the possible lost-in-translation consequences of huge-venue, huge-crowd, song-maybe-not-best-adapted-to-band-play. and i mean wed just walked in on the guy in the middle of a mini-sized set and didnt know who in hell he was but we could both remember the song the next day, and knew what was what. oh hell, its still a good song, whatever.


so anyway i love my friends but man hitch a boyfriend onto them and its like, friends? what friends? did i have friends? did i mistakenly think they wanted to hang out with me, ever, and when they did, that they didnt want to be on the phone with the boyfriends, with exemptions only for something dramatic and important and life-changing like buying tomatoes? god, plum or hothouse?

also, there are silverfish in my room and i have no idea why, unless they can sustain themselves on cigarette ashes and water and styrofoam alone. its really elegant, sitting here staring at three of their smushed corpses on the wall. i kind of keep hoping theyll remove themselves, as things often do.

(we watched from this rooftop just off the jefferson stop, which is funny because its so damn far inland its only a single stop closer to manhattan than mine, but the view was actually wicked nice, we could see the f'works on the east & the hudson, & some from i assume LI, & some rogue but impressive ones from brooklyn itself. a was dj'ing & k knew this other guy but that was the long & short of everyone i knew there, which turned out to be good since, good samaritan that i am, the night ended up involving the humanitarian project of Dancing So That Girl Can Dance With The Person She Wants to Take Home Tonight, Which Wouldnt Happen Otherwise Because Theres Actually Not A Single Other Soul Dancing For Three Square Miles. though im a perfect incarnation of grace & elegance so doesnt really matter.)

also: why are there no ballet competitions? dance-offs? meets, challenges? its got to be adaptable to competition one way or another, right? its infinitely more a sport than, say, cheerleading, and surely there are ways of distinguishing such talent (yeah time to stop being unemployed, i know, i know).

still, its hard to beat tired & happy, very much working on entirely self-sufficient, honest, still coming up with new uses for duct tape.

maybe in large part because im utterly so not cut out for this, its so low-key, low-pressure, at-will, easy -
my roommates are never here -
and im so free to miss, to long, to absorb and wish and indulge everything, every martyrdom and saintlihood and hedonism, every impulse and every impulse restrained.

it is all good, great, ok, if i can put up with this surely i can put up, reciprocally, anything.

superpowered, thats what.