i am going to maine tomorrow and its going to be great. everyone should come to maine. maine is awesome! i love maine! beaches and my moms apple pie should be enough reason for anyone.

my moral compass has stopped working; i cant tell up from down, so its a good thing im sticking to familiar roads for a few days, anyway. its just too bad that i keep having to scale what i want down to all these wacky distortions i cant recognize so well, so its hard to say whether or not i still want them. to borrow from the roomie, it may still be yours, but its not cake anymore after you eat it. and i keep pretending like i care what the smartest or wisest thing would be - as if theres any point in lecturing myself on that one - when really i just need to sit down with my dignity and ask her what she needs. does pretending its dignified help, or is it better to just own up to the trashiness and make your peace?